A group of friends and I are always involved in the planning, design, or execution of one project or another that wouldn't exactly be funded by your local research university.  Past projects have ranged from the "cricket in space" mission to the "intercontinental ballistic sheep" launcher.  Projects frequently turn out to be compromises (see also "cricket in the neighbors pond" and "interstate ballistic raisin" launcher), but we have had a few successes (check out the "let's set mike on fire" and the "full scale hindinburg reenactment" missions).  We aren't exactly the most safety conscious group but we have not had any major injuries to report, with the exception of a few injured intercontinental sheep (bad parachute design) and three or four drowned crickets.  There are unconfirmed reports, however, of some injuries in a small Finnish suburb stemming from mach 3 raisins striking pedestrians, but we claim no responsibility.
 
 

Science:

Most of the science I am involved in is highly controversial.  Phrases such as "Not in MY microwave, you don't"  and "NO WAY!...you light it!" have often delayed one experiment or another (see plasma balls, below).  The vast majority of all my experiments are based on dangerous stuff, because we all know that the more dangerous something is, the more fun it can be (see "the day we blew the door off of the microwave", below)

So, by now, I am sure you are asking yourself "where did I set my beer?", but more importantly, there is a subliminal urge to find out exactly what these experiments are so that you can rush out and start avoiding painful injuries yourself.  I usually find myself running these experiments with a group of friends, and I always seem to be the "safety officer".
 
 

The tesla coil project (in progress):  (Major update at end, 4/99)

We recently started construction of a tesla coil.  Why?  Because we are guys, and building a tesla coil involves things like insanely high voltages, exploding capacitors, and the like.  What more do you need?  So far, we are about half way done. Details follow, and will be updated frequently:

-The coil proper:
    Our tesla coil is of an old school design.  Translation: "you can't buy that kind of part anymore".  The secondary is surrounded by the primary.  It has an approximate 100:1 winding ratio, and is supported by a acrylic frame (pretty nifty stuff, acrylic...burns forever).

    Nov. 1, 1998...I recently found out that our coil design is "bi-polar".  This means that the coil has two (as opposed to the standard one) high voltage terminals.  This isn't really as neat as it sounds...it doesn't double the voltage or anything.  This type of coil is rare these days, most people preferring the mono-polar design (which, from the design, appears to be able to generate higher voltages before it self destructs).  I plan to make a mono-polar coil to compare the differences between them.

-The driver transformer:
    The driver transformer is WAY more complicated than the coil itself.  We had to anneal at least a million (maybe two) 8" long pieces of 14 gauge steel wire in a blast furnace just to make the winding core.  But, hey...that means playing around with the blast furnace...YEAH!  I am working on the 12 bazzilion turn secondary right now.  The primary was only two courses of 16 gauge wire...something like 100 turns...the secondary is 150 (yeah, count em...150) courses of NUMBER 34 GAUGE wire!  At that rate, you don't even measure the length of the wire...you just buy 6 POUNDS of it!  Gonna take me a few minutes to wind that puppy.

By the way...for the "THGTTG" fans out there, it cost me exactly 42 dollars to buy the magnetic wire for this project...coincidence?  I think not.

  Nov. 1, 1998..... This first stage transformer is killing me.  Taking WAY too much time to wind.  So far, I have wound 45 of the 150 layers of the secondary.  I may abandon it and just buy a neon sign transformer or something, except I am told that NST's don't last long....we will see.

Like I said earlier, the plans are old and call for some outdated equipment....Anyone out there got a roll of vintage 1943 "Empire cloth" for sale?  How about a microfarad cap rated 700 volts?  Yeah, I said a cap that size would be easy to find, too...you try!  I finally settled for five 600 volt, .2 microfarad caps...gonna parallel em and put the contraption in a box to prevent shrapnel when they finally decide to pop. (might be neat to watch, though).

UPDATE, APRIL 1999.  FIRST LIGHT:

WOW!  It's finally working!  I finally decided it was time to get this project off to the next stage, so I whipped up a crummy spark gap (out of my jacobs lader), grabbed a 4KV neon sign transformer, rolled two polly caps, and slapped it all together.  After about 15 minutes of fiddeling around with the cantancerous spark gap, WAY too big capacitors (even in series), and lame-o wire (poor "aligator" clips), I finally got the thing to work.  It threw about a 1.5" ark, and LOTS of blue corona off of all the sharp points!!!  IT'S ALIVE!  Okay, I realize this is poor performance, at best, but it's finally working and I am ready to start work on the next-of-kin, a 4" monopolar coil!  Can't wait!

Shortly after first light, I built a "real" spark gap out of copper pipe.  This new gap easily doubled my spark length output and has added quite a bit of corona discharge capability, as well.  I think the next big improvement will be using a larger transformer.  The 4000 is just barely enough to make a spark gap function, and the coil was really designed for a much larger power supply.  I took some pics, and will put them up if they turn out.  It may be a while, as the roll of film has yet to be finished, much less developed.
 
 
 
 

The tesla coil quiz:

For every answer of "Yes", give yourself 2 points.  For every answer of "who hasn't?" or "who doesn't", give yourself 3 points.

  1)Have you ever been shocked by over 10000 volts?
  2)Did you do it again for the fun of it?
  3)Have you ever thought to yourself "Man!  I've never seen a capacitor blow up quite like that before!!!"
  4)Do you have more than 10 pounds of magnet wire in storage somewhere in your house?
  5)More than 20 pounds?
  6)Has one of your projects ever caused the neighbors to call the police on more than two nights in a row?
  7)Have you ever caused more than 400 dollars in damage to electrical equipment at one time?
  8)Can you identify the type of failed component by the smell of the smoke?
  9)At Christmas, do you light your tree with mini plasma-globes instead of twinkle lights?
10)Have you ever set fire to a microwave trying to induce spheres of humming plasma?

Scoring:    5 points: One word, "Sigh."
              10 points: There is hope for you yet.  Go home and make a voltage multiplier to start the recovery process
              20 points: You are certianly not normal, but you pose no immediate threat to socioty.
              30 points: You are a model citizen.  Keep up the good work.
 
 
 

Microwave weirdness:

    We have yet to get this one to work exactly, but it is rumored that a burning toothpick placed in a microwave which is then turned on (full power, of course!) will produce humming balls of plasma.  The basis of this experiment are nifty balls of plasma sometimes released by lightning striking trees.  These almost sentient, glowing, humming globes drift around for minutes moving around some obstacles and burning right through others.  I would not be surprised if this phenomenon accounted for a number of reports of alien activity.

    The experiment goes something like this:  You put a toothpick and a large glass of water in a microwave.  The water is to adsorb extra microwave radiation to keep the microwave from burning itself up.  (I have heard it said a number of times that a microwave turned on with nothing in it will burn up.  I think this is just something the parent union came up with to keep kiddies from turning on microwaves for the fun of it).  The toothpick is lit, the door is shut, and the microwave is turned on.  In half a minute or so, the plasma balls are supposed to start floating around.  Haven't got it to work yet, but we are still trying.  We think that we need a higher power microwave (more power!  Yeah!)

    Please note that I am not recommending that anyone try this (standard liability waiver).  First of all, you are literally playing with fire (see "let's set mike on fire", below).  Secondly, recall the comment above about plasma balls "burning right through" some obstacles.  This could include your microwave.  Nifty, I admit, and unlikely (from reports of other people trying this), but could be pricey!
 
 
 

(Note from matt: two experiments were removed from this area to make this page conform to fortunecties rules.  Sorry, folks...that's the way it is.)

The day we set Mike on fire:

Being a group of pyros, we always have at least four sources of ignition between us (more if any one of us has eaten mexican in the past two days).  Very random objects are frequently bursting into flame around us (candles, important documents, foreign cars, rocks, small animals, and some of the more reactive alkali metals).  One day, it was posed that the lint from a clothes dryer should be VERY flammable.  This proposition was quickly tested and proved, giving a group of pyros an almost unlimited source of fun and excitement after every batch of laundry (for the record, you should see the look on a parents face when they come home and ALL of the laundry has been mysteriously done).  The obvious line of logic that followed went something like this:"Dryer lint is flammable and is therefore great stuff"...."pass the Worcestershire sauce".... "lint comes from dryers, and my socks came from the dryer...therefore, socks are great stuff"...."socks are great stuff and are therefore flammable"..."hand me a Dr. Pepper".  As it turns out, this line of thought was EXACTLY correct.  Dry socks that have been worn for a while have a thin layer of flammable lint over them.  When one lights such a sock, a funny blue flame plays quickly over the whole thing, gently warming the foot inside.  This is all well and good, and makes for a great party prank (Hey..anyone want to see me set my foot on fire?).  Unfortunately, it can only be done once...then the lint is burned off and you must walk around for a while longer to build up some more lint.  Mike, however, had another idea.

After a particularly exciting round of watching each other set our socks on fire, we slouched back in the couch and went "SIGH...we are out of socks...the fun with setting body parts on fire must be over....hand me a Dr. Pepper".  At this point, Mike looked carefully at his attire for something else to ignite.  His EXTREMELY fuzzy, wool-like shirt caught his eye, and he reached for his trusty lighter.  The result was spectacular.  A loud "WHUMP" sound was heard as the whole room lit up in a strange yellow glow.  A lowering of the Dr. Pepper can from one's face revealed the scene.  Mike had set himself on fire.  Completely on fire.  And the shirt showed no signs whatsoever of being nice and running out of fuel anytime soon.  Most people would have remembered way back in kindergarten about the "stop, drop, and roll" drill.  Not Mike.  Mike, as opposed to making some action to extinguish the fire, grabbed his hair, rolled it up, and held it out of harms way.  The odd thing is that the motion was smooth and practiced, as if he had been planing for this moment for years.  At this point, the rest of us saw a great opportunity.  There was a brief window of opportunity.  A chance to hit mike and have an excuse for it.  The flames were quickly extinguished as Mike bounced back and fourth through a barrage of pillows and coats.  After we ran out of things to throw at mike, we took a minute to observe the scene.  In the middle of the room stood Mike, slightly smoking and still holding his hair on the top of his head, grinning from ear to ear.